Back on dry land

Well we returned to dry land this morning after we packed all our stuff and we Pumped the Bilge....

From the boat we came to Norwich or as its pronounced round here Norch. We parked the car and did a little bit of shopping before we headed off to the castle. The caste was built by Barrett Homes - or that's what it looks like anyway. It was interesting though.

From there we did some more shopping and then lunch.

After lunch again it was more shopping and then checking into the hotel.

This evening we went off to the cinema to watch Gnomeo and Juliet. Really funny, go see it if you get a chance.

This evening we have just relaxed in the room ready for another full day tomorrow.

Will update tomorrow.

Steve
Sent via the Trouble BlackBerry®

Cromer and Wroxham

Well today has been a visiting day as we have been all over.

We started in Wroxham which is on the broads and very much like a seaside
town. We enjoyed a nice Fish and Chips meal in a cafe overlooking one of the
Marinas which was nice. Mark then got a chance to use his camera on the
local wildlife.

We did some shopping in Roy's - we then went across the road to another
shop, which was Roys, the shop next door was Roy's too, the one down the
street was the same, even the MacDonald's was in Roy's. Apparentky Roy owns
the majority of Wroxham....

As it was only a small shop and after the purchase of a few small items we
headed off to Great Yarmouth, however on the way there we got sidetracked
and ended up in Cromer instead.

Again Cromer is a small seaside town - with real sea and pier, and because
its only February the majority of it was closed, so we wandered round the
town, and picked up a few items in the charity shops for ideas weve had and
something for dinner.

We drove back via a number of small craft places. One of which was a mixed
store, it sold allsorts so we thought we would pop in, we were confronted by
the most comical man ever, he told us because the lady upstirs in the craft
department didn't get enough customers she had gone off to get married, but
he could offer us a piano, piano or keyboard lessons or tropical fish, and
was insistent that we had at least one of the options, this all from a big
warehouse type building in the middle of nowhere.... Sharp exit me thinks.

Anyway Back to the barge and light the fire and get ready for a quiet night
in, no laptops this evening just pure relaxation ready for our onward
journey tomorrow.

Till then

Steve

Parcels

Today has been a good day, as updated from earlier, we got all Jacqui's post
out the lovely man came from the post office to collect them and allowed us
to leave the office.

Back to the barge we have had another issue with connecting to the internet
so we had to call the service provider and now were connected so I can write
my blog on my laptop as opposed to on my Blackberry which is really hard.

Mark is still uploading more items of stock to be listed on Thursday, this
week's sale will end on Sunday, just as we get back from our Norfolk trip.
So Sunday night will be a busy night for me packing all the products ready
to go out Monday morning.

Right will sign off as I think its about time to relax and stoke up the wood
burner ready for the night ahead.

Till tomorrow

Steve x

Life on the ocean waves.....

Well were half were through day one of the break. We arrived in Norfolk at about 4pm and were immediately escorted to the barge we were to call home for the next few days. Summer Lady is a 60ft 1975 built traditional style narrow boat.

Its moored on the river Yare with loads of wildlife to watch. Its so relaxing the slow rock of the boat and the fact there is no noise is brilliant.

We have spent the day with Jacqui at her shop where she sells handbags on eBay so we have been picking her brains as she has sold over 20000 handbags so far so she's doing something right.

This evening will be just relaxing aboard and possibly an early night.

As for my health haven't really had much of a headache or neck ache today. Perhaps the relaxed lifestyle is helping.

Will update later.

Steve
Sent via the Trouble BlackBerry®

Away

Well we've done it. We managed to get out of the house, and we were only 34 minutes behind schedule. Which for us is brilliant.

I realised earlier that I haven't updated all weekend so here goes with a big update.

Friday I was in the office and managed to get loads done, I actually felt part of the team again. After work I went for coffee with my friend Dr Jon which was good as we just watched the world go by and had a good catch up.

Mark picked me up in town and we went shopping for dinner. Marks good at his mixed grills. From there we just veged in front of the tv watching DVD's and I did more on our diamante throw - which is slowly getting there...

Saturday we were up and dressed pretty early. I did the post run for the last of our weekly sales. Everyone should have their purchases by monday hopefully.

Saturday afternoon was spent photographing more stock which will be uploaded on Thursday - see even when were away were working.... I even have a box of tights in the car ready for this weeks sales....

Last night we did our packing and ironing ready for today, nothing like being organised. It was then veg on the sofa and more diamante and Mark with his ebay pictures.

This morning we were up full cooked breakfast and load the car. Were now whizzing down the motorway on our way.

Don't worry about the cats and the in-laws We've left them loads of food and they are house trained - the cats just please themselves :-)

We just decided whilst listening to Michael Balls Sunday Brunch show that Neil Diamonds Forever in Blue Jeans is our new song because he would rather have me and have to wear blue jeans than not to have me and have sequins.... Soppy sod. But it is really relevant to us.

Anyway will sign off and update later.

Steve x
Sent via the Trouble BlackBerry®

Clear the air

Well today has been one of those days again, I haven't done much and I feel
the benefit of it already, I'm even going to be in bed for 8.30 so that am
all fresh for tomorrow.

Today my mum has been down and we've had a good chat about a number of
things that were on my mind.

Hopefully now after the other conversations we've had this week things will
be much better. The one problem that existed is everyone had gone in
separate directions with the same idea and it had all gone wrong.

Communication is the key me thinks, perhaps this could be chapter two in my
"book of how to be ill"

I'm in the office tomorrow again which I will enjoy then a friend is meeting
me in town who I haven't seen for a while.

I already feel a lot more relaxed - and next week away in Norfolk will
increase this relaxed state even more.

Mark has also uploaded a load more stock to the eBay store so that will run
whilst were away.

Will update tomorrow after work.

Steve

Quickie

Just a quick one before I go to bed.

Today has been a long day, and I am noticing the Chemo kicking in. Today was
the last day though so I should start to feel better now, at least I wont
have stomach ache any more this week.

Off to bed, I may even knock my alarm back an hour or so so I get a little
extra.

Will update in the morning on how I slept, although saleep doesnt appear to
be an issue at the moment, I shut my eyes an off I go.

Steve x

Thought Provoking

Someone has just sent me an email with a really nice comment in, that I
thought I would share with you, I suppose it applies to anyone in my
situation, its small things like this thought that really do make me keep
going through the day. I don't feel special doing what I do every day, to me
its just living, others see it as special.

You're such a fighter! So strong and motivated! People like you are the
ones we admire, you show us how

not to give up, how not to put yourself down, how to get up and get on
because others are far worse off than us.

Thank you xxxxx

Will update later

Steve

People

I said I would update again this evening and I am.

The last few days have been a little stressful for a few reasons, some of
which are just the usual day to day stresses, and others due to my illness.

Having Cancer doesn't just effect the person but a wide circle of people
around you as well. That's the big problem I have had this week.

Last week with my scan and results I now regret telling people that I was
going for the scan and the results, even though there was no results.

Now this sounds awful but when everyone you meet on a daily basis want to
know the same thing over and over it starts to really rub.

I know that people are asking me out of pure interest and care in me, and
that's lovely. I just don't want to be the centre of attention all the time.
Which coming from someone who lived in the spotlight with Miss Whiplash is
rather odd.

Never mind I'm sure it will all come out in the wash, like I say it's just
been one of those weeks.

On another slat, my diary is filling up with dates of meetings and events I
need to attend, and now social events were invited too, I have to put
everything in my diary otherwise I forget, and Mark has them in his diary
too so that he is aware of where we are or where I am if I go AWOL

Another direction - I have just had some exciting news that may see a one
off appearance by Miss Whiplash, details will be confirmed but will be nice
to see the old girl back in the swing of things, even if it is just for one
event.

Anyway, rant over and news delivered so am off to bed, another day at my
desk tomorrow, I'm getting good at this working lark, that's if I can stay
at my desk long enough and my PC doesn't throw me off, then am off to BASIC
tomorrow where again I need to make more plans for the next few weeks.

Night all

Steve x

Post office

Well this morning was a massive visit to the post office. I caused quite a queue and a few tempers were raised am sure. I stopped counting at 25 parcels. Ooops

From there it was off to the Neuro Support Group.

One thing that came out at this meeting and has come up at BASIC is that its not easy to be ill. There is lots to organise, meetings to attend, appointments to attend, forms to fill in and so on. There is actually very little time to be ill....

The other thing is all this information is out there but you have to go and find it. There are support groups but again unless you have been in the loop beforehand you don't know about them. I commented today that someone should write a book "How to be ill - all the info you need" it would be a bloody big book but useful too.

Maybe that should be my next task...

Am currently on my way up to my mums for dinner, she normally comes to us but we thought we would have a change. And its also a chance to see my dad.

All ready for this weekends trip down to Norfolk. Just hope the people were seeing don't get a bug in the meantime.

Anyway am signing off as writing this in a dark car isn't a good idea for anyone's eyes.

You might get an update later£ who knows.

Steve x
Sent via the Trouble BlackBerry®

Mid Day Update

Well I'm working again from home and my machine is painfully slow, that and
after being in the office on Friday where it was super fast I am really
noticing that its slow.

I've had my Chemo for today and that all went without a hitch. I didn't even
have any sick feelings today.

The eBay sale has now finished for this week and I will be spending this
evening packaging over 50 items to be posted, some of them went this morning
but there is still a lot of items to be paid for so will be a busy week
overall.

More items will be uploaded on Thursday so that they can run whilst we are
away and they will finish the day we get back.

We will have at least one laptop with us though so will be able to keep
track of the questions that come in.

Will update a little more later when am all packaged out.

Steve x

Busy....

Today has been one of those days where we could have got lots more done but
we haven't.

We did have plans to go to the Chinese New year celebrations in town but the
weather and tiredness got in the way.

The weather didn't look brilliant anyway and it started raining a number of
times during the afternoon so that was one thing, and the other is I was
tired and felt a little sick (although you wouldn't believe that if you
could see what I have eaten this evening)

I'm Still getting back into the swing of the Chemo and how I have to take
it. One hour after food and no food until an hour after, the problem is I
think is I pick, and I had a drink shortly after I took the tablets so its
all my fault. At least I only have 3 days left now though and then its done.

At least they don't make me really sick.

This afternoon from about 4pm it's been all about eBay. As mark uploaded the
sales this time last week, and they are slowly starting to finish.

So all afternoon I have been fielding questions and printing invoices.

It's nice to see the costumes going to new owners, and some of them are
going to people we know well which is also touching that they would like to
continue wearing our costumes.

Anyway its been a long day, and my neck is now stiff. The sales are still
coming in but won't be finished for a few hours yet so will have to check
them in the morning.

Will update tomorrow on how it all went.

Another day of work for the office tomorrow.

Steve x

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Well it's the end of the day and am officially back in the country lol.

We headed back from Scotland this afternoon and were home within 2 hours, so
all was good, it's a shame the weather was so bad.

Anyway was a lovely day out with Mark, Nick and Geoff and was completely
unplanned, which was the best part of the day.

Have started taking my chemo again today and am now on the full dose that I
will be taking and I had forgotten how tired it makes me, it leaves me
physically drained, that with the walking we have done today am a little
pooped now, so won't be a late night for me.

At least the sickness is staying at bay as I have said before that's one
area I really couldn't be doing with.

http://shop.ebay.co.uk/dragshopping/m.html

The Shop is going well and most of the items now have less than 24 hours to
go so will be checking back every couple of hours now to see where the
bidding is at.

Will sign off now and will update more tomorrow.

Steve x

Sunshine chasing

Well were out and about today. Mark is taking us on a magical mystery tour, were currently just outside Carlisle so heaven only knows where were going.

Have started my next 5 days of chemo today and touch wood I feel ok no sickness. So hopefully that will be the way forward.

Another problem I have had for the past few days is nits.... No not really, the hair I lost through radiotherapy is starting to grow back and its bloody itchy. I have tries all sorts of creams and potions but nothing helps its just something again I have to put up with.

Well it looks like we found a little bit of sunshine near Carlisle. So the camera will be out later.

Will update later.

Steve x
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Busy

I've had a great day today and it's been all go. I was in the office for
10am this morning Mark dropped me off at the office. I did have a mini
disaster when I stepped out of the car, and my Trilby (yes I was dapper and
wore my Trilby today) blew off and down the street leaving me Mid City
centre with loads of people around and bald.

I had to run and chase it, fortunately one of the guys from the office was
outside and managed to get it before it got trashed.

Anyway in the office I have had a really busy and productive day and
actually felt part of the team again and work felt right. Although I was
getting tired towards the end of my shift at 3pm.

After work I had an interview to record for Gaydio (Gaydio.co.uk) its for a
feature at the end of the month on Cancer, and I basically went on and
recorded my story.

It was interesting recording for them as I listen regular and was nice to
put a place and processes to something I hear every day.

Will let you all know when it's going to be on as soon as I know, but they
have said that they will send me an edit so will put it on the website so
that you can all listen to it if you manage to miss it.

It was then back home on the bus, and for those of you that know me I HATE
BUSSES, now don't call me a snob or anything, but busses seem to be full of
random people with no direction (and some of the busses I get the people
smell too.... It just drives me wild. I couldn't wait to get off the bus and
get home.

This evening it's just a relaxing time and then off to bed as were off out
tomorrow with Geoff and Nick to the Lakes for the day (weather permitting)

Well that's about it for today will update tomorrow whilst on my travels.

Steve

Calm

Well today has been an odd day for me, I haven't wanted to do anything other
than things for myself.

After the relief of the results yesterday I just wanted to do things that I
needed to do and have been putting off just to get them clear, I posted
letters that needed to go etc and make a couple of phone calls. I even had a
nap for an hour on the sofa, Did a bit of the diamante on the throw then
went for my massage at BASIC which always leaves me feeling much better.

I do feel guilty about work though, but will catch p tomorrow when am in.

I was speaking to my mum earlier on the phone when Mark phoned me and I
ended up with two lines running, then I couldn't get through to my mum again
so it all went wrong.

Will give her a call tomorrow in my lunch hour from work.

I'm off to bed now as the massage has really taken it out of me, she did say
that I would be tired this evening.

Nothing else to report so will sign off and see you all tomorrow.

Steve

And the results are in....

Well as I said earlier I went for the results of my MRI scan today and as I
expected (and hoped) there really isn't any news.

Because of my Radiotherapy and chemo treatment there is still a lot going on
in my head that can makes the situation look worse up there with swelling
and such, but this doesn't necessarily mean that it is bad news.

He said there were no areas of concern and that everything was as expected
to be up there for a scan result for now.

He has suggested that I stick with the steroids for a while longer just
whilst things settle down.

He has said I can phase myself back into work, but have to be ultra careful
for infections as my immune system will be lowered whilst im on the chemo
and working in an office isn't the ideal place for a chemo patient because
of the bugs that go round, but he said as long as am careful and don't
overdo it I should be OK.

He also said I am able to fly I just have to take a few precautions whilst
doing so, and again the main issue is infection. So looks like things are
slowly getting back to a normal or as normal as can be.

I feel a lot more positive now after today's meeting and know the headaches
are just something that my body is doing to whilst it sorts itself out.

So all in all not a bad day - although I did learn something at BASIC - I'm
not good at glass painting, I just don't have steady hands so it looks a bit
pants.

Never mind, will stick to cards and diamante application.....

Steve x

Chemo and MRI results

Well today is the day I get my full dose of chemo tablets and the results of last weeks MRI scan. I'm sat waiting for the oncologist and have already had my bloods taken so waiting game continues.

eBay is doing well and was a welcome distraction last night. About today's results.

I know that today's scan results are not as massively important as there is still lots going on in my head with the radiotherapy etc but they are still results non the less.

Will update after my meeting.

Steve x

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Sales Sales Sales

Well today has been another busy day for sales in the eBay shop, and so have
spent my day split working for the office and managing the sales coming in,
this evening then I have been out in the dressing room packaging all the
sales. Hopefully next weekend will be the same as we have over 70 items on
there all finishing the same day so should be a busy weekend.

We also popped to Nick and Geoff's to say Hi. They have suggested that we go
to the Lakes at the weekend for a drive out, so weather permitting we will
be off up there for a drive, obviously if its tipping down with rain we
won't be going, but we don't mind a bit of cold.

Today health wise I have consumed my mass of Vitamins and Immune building
drugs as well as my steroids which am really now starting to loath and can't
wait to start coming off them again, I might just have to push myself a
little more this time when coming off them and put up with the headaches a
little more - I know I will expect them and have been told this so will just
have to wait and see, hopefully because I haven't got any other issues like
a cold etc it should be easier this time.

Tomorrow will be another busy day with work as got a few things I need to
do, I don't mind as it really does keep my gray matter ticking over, and
stops me from vegetating watching daytime TV. Some people say I shouldn't be
working as I'm supposed to be ill, but in my eyes working is actually
keeping me healthy and active. I now know my limits and if I'm getting to
the stage where I'm tired, I simply stop, or as I did the other day at Nick
and Geoff's I just fall asleep. It's actually quite nice to have a nap of an
afternoon if you feel like it....

Anyway I got some interesting stats from Natalya at BT Buddies today
http://www.btbuddies.org.uk/

More people under 40 die of a brain tumor than any other cancer.

Brain tumors have recently overtaken leukemia as the most common malignancy
and cause of death in children.

16,000 are diagnosed with a primary brain tumor in the UK every year.

65% more women die of a brain tumor than from cervical cancer.

20% of all cancers now spread to the brain.

Brain Tumor research receives less that 1% (0.7%) of cancer research
spending in the UK.

With more than 120 different types of tumor, brain tumors are a notoriously
difficult disease to diagnose.

Brain tumors are a particularly devastating form of cancer with one of the
lowest survival rates.

Patient personality changes as a result of a brain tumor cause massive
family disruption.

Will be using these in my interview on Friday for the radio. I know it makes
grim reading but not widely known, its mad we all know about Breast and
Testicular cancer but as for the brain, it tends to be widely forgotten.

I will let you all know how the interview goes and what radio station it
will be aired on, as he does for two radio stations, and when it's on. Will
also try and upload it to my website if I can get a digital cophy.

Anyway am on my way to bed now, will update tomorrow

Steve x

Well thats it

Well that's it, all parcels done and ready for collection by the couriers
(it's easier than going to the post office and cheaper)

Mark has uploaded more stock

http://shop.ebay.co.uk/dragshopping/m.html

If you want to check them out, I'm sure there will be more to follow this
week as Mark is on a roll with all this.

Anyway only came on to say goodnight to you all and will update tomorrow
with more goings on.

Steve x

PC Screwups

Well I thought today would be a good day for eBay, but looks like a little
technical issue thwarted our planes.

We have spent the majority of today getting items on the eBay listing tool
we use.

We had over 20 items on there and as it takes so long to to uploaded the
pictures.

Anyway, we started to upload at 4.30 ready for the best time of 5pm and the
bloody thing crashed and deleted all the listings, and now my machine just
wont work again, so Mark is having to go through and re-do all the listings.

Last week's sales finished just after 5pm so I have been packaging the
orders up ready for postage tomorrow. So at least I have managed to do
something constructive today.

The whole eBay thing is getting to be a bit of a bug now for the both of us
and will be something that we end up doing for quite a while, as one of the
things we would like to do is make things both of a craft nature and also
for the Drag market so I'm sure we will need a retail outlet for it
somewhere, (that and I keep making cards at BASIC so will be overrun with
those)

Anyway will go and check to see if anyone else has made a payment so that I
can wrap their products for tomorrow.

Steve x

Update

Well Yesterday was an early night for me, we went to bed at 9 to watch a
film, and am sure we were fast asleep not much after 10, so I'm taking
peoples word and actually having more rest.

Today is a hectic day for us as we have to get all the items we photographed
yesterday uploaded to eBay by 4pm.

Those that don't get uploaded today will go on Thursday

The link to the eBay store If your interested is

http://shop.ebay.co.uk/dragshopping/m.html

There will be lots of unique items being listed on there over the next
couple of weeks from the Trouble Wardrobe, and then who knows what we will
sell. We have offered to sell my mother but she's not that interested.....

Will update again later when it's all done if I'm not all listed out.

Steve

Mini Update

Well it's been another busy day for us here at Trouble Towers (haven't
called the hose that for some time now, as that's the operational centre of
Trouble, who no longer exist since they went into retirement when I came
ill. But today has been a very Trouble Day. We have been photographing stock
ready to be uploaded to the shop. We have photographed gowns today we
haven't seen in some time, which has brought back a lot of memories too.

The eBay sales are looking goof for this week and can be

found at

http://shop.ebay.co.uk/dragshopping/m.html

More will be uploaded tomorrow at 4 so that there is an overlap of items on
there. They will also be linked on my Facebook and Mark will too, so were
going for maximum exposure.

The thing is the more we sell the more room we have to photograph the other
items in there so it looks like a never ending task, but I'm sure we will
get there eventually.

Am going to spend this evening putting the adverts together ready for
tomorrow and then will start again tomorrow ready for next week, oh it looks
like we have weeks of fun ahead.

Need to order some more eyelashes too as we have had a sudden rush of
eyelash orders.....

Will update in a while when I'm all stocked out.

Steve

Scans, and falling asleep

Well yesterday was my scan, and as expected went without a hitch.

I'm becoming an old pro at these things now and don't tend to worry about
them, if I need a line in my arm, them I need a line in my arm, not an
issue.

I still find it fascinating that the machines are multimillion pond machines
and they make one hell of a noise. I understand why they are noisy, but I
still find it comical.

I should hopefully get the results on Wednesday when I next have my meeting
at the hospital.

Last night Matt Martin came round as he was having a photo shoot with
another friend for his new business venture.

We had dinner, (chippy tea) and then all went round to Nick and Geoff's
where Chris was there too so we had a laugh about all old things and watched
a very low budget film, very predictable but funny. One problem is we didn't
leave till gone one, I was asleep well before midnight on the sofa. The
problem was I had had a small drink too, Nick decided that I could have a
Martini and Lemonade. Was nice to actually have a drink and as it was only a
low ABV wasn't really not an issue.

Today is eBay sales day so I have to make my way to the post office with a
load of parcels, then this afternoon its upload more ready for Sunday.

Will update later with what am upto, need a shower and get to the post
office before 12 so need to get a wriggle on.

Steve x

All day in work.....

Well today has been one of those days when I shouldn't have got out of bed
because no matter what I did I knew someone would see it as being wrong.

I started this morning tryng to go to work, and I just couldn't get out of
the front door. I forgot my wallet, then I had to go back because I forgot
my phone, then I had to pick my medication up at the pharmacy and they are
not the quickest, they go at their own pace even though I was the only
customer.

The bus journey was a typical slow joirney and I finally managed to get to
town and enjoy the stroll from the stop to the office,, all going well.

In work I managed to gt everything done so much quicker as the systems are
quicker there and it is just easier. This afternoon we have been
interviewing for a new member of staff which we need to take on pretty
quickly. The one problem was that the interviews went on and on and I didn't
finish till 5.30pm which mark was angry at. He wanted me to finish at around
3pm as that's more than enough for me 10 - 3pm

I know he's right and that I shouldn't throw myself into the office that
much but with being in the office and enjoying being out I didn't notice the
time and such, although I will have to ensure that I don't do it again as I
know its not beneficial to myself.

I'm off to bed shortly as its another early start tomorrow as I have to be
at Christies for 9.15am ready for my scan. I should hopefully know the
results of this scan on Wednesday at my next Oncology Appointment, so will
be a long weekend for me. Not that I'm going to focus on it though as I know
this scan is not the most important one I will have at the moment.

Will just have to occupy myself with other things and then have the meeting
on Wednesday.

Anyway off to bed for me I think.

Till tomorrow

Steve x

Im going to do it.....

Well I thought I would wrote an update before I go to bed.

Tomorrow I am in the office as its recruitment so im combining this with a
day in the office.

This evening I have been doing something really therapeutic. Applying
Diamante to a throw that me and mark are making, it takes so long to do each
one but you can get into the swing of it and do it whilst watching the TV,
being so small though it doesn't appear to be getting any further, so a
couple more nights curled up on the sofa with it yet.

If anyone wants me to make them one (they are lovely) let me know and will
book you in for some time next winter lol, I might just have finished this
one then.

After my visit to BASIC today I have realised that Craft is something that I
could actually do more of, as it does keep me occupied and is varied which
is my main problem, so doing the craft might just keep me occupied on the
dark cold nights. Time will tell.

Anyway mark is still out at his dinner so am off to bede so that am fresh
tomorrow.

Might not get chance to do an update during the day tomorrow so will
definitely have to do one tomorrow on my day in the office.

Steve x

Wednesday

Well, again last night I didn't manage to do another Blog entry, but then
again I had done some entries during the day so its not too bad.

I actually find it easier to do entries during the day as and when they come
up rather than trying to put it all down at the end of the night when I'm
clearly tired and not in the mood.

Last night was another early night in bed after we watched the program My
Big fat Gypsy Wedding. It's just amazing the lifestyle they have and how
closed it is to the outside world.

Anyway, today I have managed to get all my work done for the office that I
need to do and will soon be having lunch. This afternoon is my weekly trip
to BASIC, which I am really enjoying as its time out from everything where I
can talk freely to other likeminded people.

This evening I will be adding crystals to a throw that me and Mark are
making as he is at a dinner presentation so will be home alone, so might as
well get it done.

Thursday is my day in the office so will have an early night tonight to
ensure am fresh and ready as I will be interviewing new people for the
office ready for summer. It's great to be back in the swing of things at the
office even though its only one day a week at the moment then hopefully can
build this up to a few.

One problem I am having at the moment is sleeping through.

This green tea although its doing me the world of good and is really
detoxing my body, it makes me want to go at all times of the day, I have
stopped drinking after 7pm to see if this helps and no, so I just have to
put up with it, I was hanging washing up this morning at 4.15am as I was
wide awake, oh well at least the washing was dry when I got up this
morning....

Oh well almost lunchtime, will update later maybe after BASIC

Steve x

Direction West

Well today I'm supposed to be thinking about work little else, the problem
is I'm thinking of little else and no work.

I suppose I have managed to get quite a bit done this morning so I am at
least well ahead in that respect but this afternoon I just haven't got it in
me to focus. I keep finding something else to distract myself. eBay is evil
and needs to be blocked for working hours, why would I want a 1000 pieces of
jewellery making bits for a bargain price of £4.99, I don't know either, but
I was strangely tempted.

I know I need to do the dishes too, but I'm resisting temptation as if I
leave my desk that will be it I will be on a whole new road to nowhere...

I thought if I wrote this it might just push me in the right direction,
between me and you - It didn't...

Never mind.

Till later

Steve

10pm that's my lot

Well again last night I didn't manage to complete my blog as I fell asleep,
before 10pm

This is now becoming a regular occurrence again, it can't be a bad thing
though as if my body needs sleep then it needs sleep simple as.

That and I have been getting up several times a night to go to the loo as
the green tea is really clearing me out, good in one respect bad in the
other that it keeps me awake. I do feel the benefits of the tea though so
that's a good thing.

As for the 10pm cut off this is becoming a standard time, and have set
myself this limit now so that if I do have a late night at any point in the
week or weekend then I'm in credit as it were, at least then I can still do
all the things I want to do and not be as tired.

This week is a strange week coming up as I have my MRI scan on Friday and
so that I can have the results ready for my next oncologist meeting on the
2nd. I can't say I am not worried about the scan but I do understand that
this is not the most important one I will be having and is simply an
indicator of how things are going. The one downside of the scan is I have
the have an injection of dye to highlight my brain etc, and this has some
strange reactions as its going in and coming out again, let's just say the
smell it produces on the way out is like a pack of wet dogs, so not
nice.....

I'm working a full day again today for the office and want to go into the
office on Thursday as we have interviews for new members of staff if it can
be arranged with the candidates. I will go in any way as it's nice to get
into the office at least once a week o integrate with the social aspect and
catch up on all the politics.

Will update later after my mum has been down.

Steve

End of the weekend

Well I didn't do a Blog yesterday so will catch up this morning whilst I
work for my Work PC to catch up with itself.

Yesterday was a good day although I did have headache for most of it, I
think I slept funny the night before and have twisted my neck so that isn't
helping.

Over the weekend we have started the massive task of uploading all our drag
to eBay as its not selling quick enough via Facebook, so at least its now on
Facebook and on eBay so reaching a much broader audience.

It will be sad but also interesting to see the costumes go, as it's the end
of one part of my (and Marks Life) over with but it also means the start of
something completely new.

It's also exciting watching people bid on the items that your selling. And
it makes you want to list more and more, and push the bidding.

The only downside now is the fact I have loads of parcels to go to the post
office.

We did 30 auctions as a test this week to ensure we were getting the right
mix of advert on and now we know the secret we will be uploading more this
week ready for Sunday, as Sunday is the magic eBay day.

One nice thing I have heard this weekend is the little task I sent out on my
Blog and on Facebook regarding mason in Kansas, who wanted valentines cards
from all over the world so he could put a little pin of love on his Map,
loads of my family and friends from all round the world have sent him one
and passed on the message. I really hope he gets thousand as it's such a
sweet thing to do.

Today am trying to get myself back into work mode as I really want to start
returning to the office more, so am working as normal a routine as possible.
I have to check with the Oncologist again in Feb if it is OK but he did say
there shouldn't be any issues as long as I know that I have to limit myself,
which is something I'm getting good at, I will now put my hand up and say
I'm tired and need to stop.

Will update later.

Will have to go and check my sales, its really exciting watching the bids go
up....

Steve

Weekend

Well it's the weekend, as you may know I didn't do a blog yesterday as I was
tired, and had very little that I could say.

My mum and Gran came down all day, but I don't feel this is special, this is
normal and not noteworthy, that sounds awful but I know what I mean,

It was good to see my Mum and Granny though as well as my friend Justian who
popped by.

As for the evening I was in bed by 10pm as I was pretty tired and wasn't
much after that, that I was well into the land of nod, I was that sleepy
that I didn't even wear my earplugs and slept all the way through.

As for today, its been another pretty normal day for us, tidy the house this
morning, then lunch and then Justian came by again, He's a real tonic as we
don't get to see him often so was nice for him to come round, that and Mark
was working yesterday when he came round, so we had tea and cake.

This evening we have been adding more of our costumes to eBay , we really
need to get onto the whole thing and get it cleared out, hopefully not that
Xmas is out of the way and people are returning back to normal, things will
start to sell again.

Once our dressing room is empty we have plans to do loads of other stuff so
we need to get onto that pronto.

It's sad getting rid f all the costumes, but also therapeutic in the same
light so something I can do without an issue now.

Will add the link to the shop on my blog tomorrow but you can always look up
some of the thing on my Facebook already, they will always be uploaded on a
Sunday as that's the best day to finish eBay sales.

Another thing I have been informed about via the BT Buddies website founder
Natalya is a little chap in the USA Mason. He is 9 years old and has been
diagnosed with DIPG Tumour. His mom has come up with the idea of people
sending him Valentine's day cards from all around the world, he will then
pin a little love heart on his huge map at home from wherever they are from.

This is both a sweet idea for mason and his brother and sister but also
educational too.

If you would like to send him a card, please send it to:

Mason Kempf

7700 W. 96th terrace

Overland Park

KS66212

USA

I will be sending him a card with my details on so that he can pin a little
heart of love t his map, and if you have it in your heart you will too. If
you want to pass this on to any of your far flung friends that would be
brilliant too.

I'm also getting ready this week to have a full week in the office (or as
full as I can make it, will be working from home Monday and Friday and then
the office Tuesday and Thursday, I will then phase the Home working over to
Office working. I enjoyed working last week at the Office last week, and the
whole getting back to normal is brilliant.

I have also finished the concoction of Antibiotics I have been on all week
today, which is a godsend as the tablets were huge and I didn't like taking
them, I know they were good for me but I hated the monotony of having to
take tablets at certain times of the day and being tied to a clock, I know I
have to do this when am on Chemo but that is a while structured routine for
5 days and is a little simpler.

Anyway will sign off as I have to take the last of today's pills and then
its bedtime.

Till tomorrow

Steve x

Back to normal

Well today was my return to the office world in a normal state.

I managed to work in the office 9.30am till 4, I will admit I was tired, but
I loved every minute of it. Its the biggest step I have taken in the last
couple of months to getting some kind of normality and structure back in my
life. Yes I have been normal at home and such but returning to work is a big
change for me, as working from home doesn't appear too have made much of an
impact, just serving to occupy my mind whilst at home.

It was great to be back in the office and immediately fall into the role
that I left over 4 months ago, and the whole team just carried on as normal,
they even pestered me to do little bits, which is just like old times.....

I had the discussion with my boss about returning and the are happy for me
to do it as and how I can.

My hair is still trying to grow back slowly but surely and everyone that
strokes my head says its bristly and definitely some re-growth there, its
thicker on the right and back than on the left where I had the Radio
therapy, but its at least a start, let's just hope that it doesn't grow back
ginger or curly, otherwise it will be funky hair colours, head shaving etc
for me going forward.

Anyway, I'm off to bed my legs are aching today, something I haven't seen
for a couple of days, it comes and goes but something I have to put up with.
Its probably the fact I have been continuously sat at my desk today and I
haven't been walking round, will have to ensure that when I do go to the
office I walk around etc to keep my legs going, it works at home so it
should work in the office.

Night all

Steve x

PS someone again said today that I am an inspiration, all I will say is I'm
no more special that anyone, I'm just a normal person that has had some
really crappy news, and has taken one of the only two decisions I had, sit
back and let this illness consume me or stand up and fight and see where it
gets me. I chose to stand and fight, stay positive and keep on going. If I
can encourage other people in the same situation to do the same then that's
brilliant.

Positivity, love and a bloody stubborn determination to keep going is my new
philosophy, if anyone else wants to share it then its free for the taking, I
hope it stands you in as much good stead as it appears to be doing me.

Back on the right path

Well today has been a good day and am on the mend now, just need to get rid
of the chesty part of the cough that is slowly coming out.

I have had my weekly visit to BASIC today and thoroughly enjoyed it, it's
very therapeutic being with other people in similar situations, I even feel
comfortable to sit there with no hat on.

One thing I have noticed though whilst there today is that my hair is
starting to grow back ever so slightly, all be it slightly bristly...

My Fatigue is starting to drop again which is good, and I actually made the
visit to BASIC myself although I did need a cuppa when I got there....

The fatigue comes and goes now on its own, I just have to put up with it
when it's here, like a miserably aunty who just won't go....

After BASIC Mark and myself went to the Cinema because its Orange Wednesday,
which makes it much more affordable, although it's not expensive if you can
get it cheaper it's a bonus. One thing I have found out though at BASIV is
if you're on DLA you are entitled to a CEA Card http://www.ceacard.co.uk/
this entitles the holder to go to the cinema with a carer and the carer to
attend free, this is any time of the week not just Wednesdays.

It also acts as a discount card at theatres and other venues to, you just
have to ask (they advertise the UB40 discounts but Disability benefits are
rarely advertised.

We discussed the number of benefits available to people that do not get
highlighted to people I need, and I think between the few o us we could come
up with a list and pass it round, as there doesn't appear to be anywhere
with a concise list, when it's done will publish it on my blog.

Anyway am off to bed now, as it's been a long day and again am tired.

Will update tomorrow

Steve x

Day of rest

Well its official, today I haven't done anything, I have been perched on the
sofa all day watching daytime TV, and I can honestly say I feel better for
it.

I'm having another early night tonight and then will decide in the morning
if in going to work or not. I know I have BASIC tomorrow afternoon so will
see if im going in or not.

My legs are really achy today though, they were yesterday too, I feel like I
have done a thousand miles. I have been trying to stretch them out but its
not getting any better, must just be fatigue getting to me, but I wont let
it get to me, will just work my way through it.

Had a conversation with my mum today about living in a bubble, and know it's
not possible to completely block myself away from coughs and sneezes
completely but any of the situations that I can block out the better and I
will be doing, because of the fact that I have been well for the last couple
of months we have all become complacent with the small things and this
weekend was just a reminder that I'm not superman and I do need to take a
little extra care.

Those around me understand this which is good, so hopefully I won't offend
anyone if I say I can't see them if they have any sign of bugs.

One thing that has intrigued me the last few days is the number of people
that ready this blog. And Whilst watching Casualty there is a guy on there
that's also a regular blogger.

It would be great if you could just leave me a little msg on the comment
section of this blog (you don't have to sign up) just to say who you are and
where you're from, I think it would be really interesting (don't worry you
don't have to use your real name)

Anyway its shower time and then off to bed.

Steve x

An Unexpected Visit

Well its been a funny weekend, but not in the funny Haha way.

I haven't been in the best of health this weekend, the chesty caught that I
was suffering from has got hold of me more than would normally happen, and
as a result I felt terrible, this combined with the issues I have whilst
coming down from the steroids, I was a really unwell bunny and after a call
to the Christies Hotline they suggested that I come in for a check-up. So on
Sunday afternoon, when all I wanted to do was relax and feel sorry for
myself, we were Christies bound.

Several doctors and nurses gave me a complete onceover and it was suggested
that I stay in under observation. They also gave me a high dosage of
Antibiotics to help with the chest complaint. They have also put my steroids
back up again so at least that solves that problem for today, just have to
work on it now ready to come back down again.

I also had a Chest X-Ray to ensure that there was no underlying issues. I
had to wait till 10pm last night for that but from what the radiographer
said, there was no issues, this was then confirmed this, so again that was
good.

They sent me home this afternoon with a couple more days of antibiotics and
more steroids.

The whole weekend has helped to remind all of us of how I need to look after
myself a little more, and the fact that I have done so well has only lulled
us all into a false sense of security, just a small sniffle for one person
is a likely to be a big issue of me, especially considering that fact that
next month I will be on the full strength Chemo and my immune system will be
compromised even more.

The long shot of all this is I need to avoid anyone and situations that
would expose me to bugs, this sounds awful as its blocking the access to
family and friends, but I have to be selfish going forward and think of
myself first. Hopefully people will understand this situation and won't be
offended if I ask them not to come. I have even said to Mark, that if he has
a sniffle I will be moving to the other bedroom, it literally does mean
cutting all the situations out that I can.

Anyway I'm having an early night, something else that I need to ensure I do
more regularly, as sleep is one of the most important things for the body.

Night, till tomorrow.

Steve

Lunch

Well am bored, the whole new trying to get myself into work mode just isn't working today, I have even asked the office is there is anything I can do and they have all said they are quiet too, so no help to me.

I have checked Facebook, sent a snotty email to PayPal, and deleted all my junk mail, nothing much else to do sat at my desk. Might have to go and make lunch.

I am tired today, although I did sleep right through last night which is good as I normally male a trip to the loo every couple of hours, I have set myself a limit of 8pm to stop drinking, it so far works.

Will update later

Steve


Sent via the Trouble BlackBerry®

Mini

I'm tired. I just can't get myself motivated.

Steve
Sent via the Trouble BlackBerry®

Fresh Air

Well it's been a strange day, I woke up in a really crap mood, I felt ill,
not physically just down and really unhappy.

I don't know why I felt like that but I did.

That and I have a really croaky voice today, again it's not sore it's just
really croaky, it does this sometimes so am not worried.

Anyway we ended up at Cheshire Oaks and the fresh air and the general hustle
and bustle of the place cleared my head, and after an hour or so of walking
round I was OK, perhaps I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed....

We're off to Nick and Geoff's now to play Wii so will have a fun evening,
will update later.

Steve

Yesterday

Well I did it again yesterday. I forgot to blog. The day was pretty mundane. I worked all day for the office. I'm getting myself into a routine of a full day at my desk ready for when am allowed to return to the office.

It does make me tired but of anything its the change of routine that am working to break. No more homes under the hammer for me. Even the small jobs I were doing like dishes etc now get left to when I come home from the office as it were, therefore I'm back to normal.

Last night we popped to Nick and Geoffs for a few hours then back home ready for Shameless and bed.

Other than that I'm finding my life is pretty mundane and getting back to normal.

Will update later on today. Have only done this as my machine is crawling..

Steve
Sent via the Trouble BlackBerry®

Tired

The only real thing can mention about today is the fact I'm tired.

Although saying that I have still managed to get a lot done.

My mum came round this morning and we did the post office run again things
are really hotting up with the shop and have a number of parcels to go out
every day, so again that's something that gets me out of the house and makes
me have my walk every day.

This afternoon I was again at BASIC doing a recreational course, this is an
effort to socialise myself with people in the same boat as myself and also
do something that I cannot think about cancer for a few hours.

The group is great and we had a laugh so I will be going again next week, I
eve managed to teach the group something too.

After the group Mark picked me up and we went off to the Trafford centre to
watch a movie as its Orange Wednesday, but everything we wanted to watch
started late and I as I'm tired now I didn't want to be out too late so we
ended up at ChaoBaby - it's an all you can eat Thai Buffet, hence were both
now waddling around feeling rather full.

Another thing that happened today is the arrival of the Radiotherapy Masks
that both me and Mark will be decorating for BT Buddies, They will be going
into an exhibition in London later in the year.

It was a little odd though seeing the masks again as that part of my
treatment is now over and am moving on to other areas. The other thing is
one of the Masks was a child's mask, and it just made me think of the child
having to go through the same thing as I did.

Anyway that's about all for today, am sure there is more but I can't think
as I have headache ad am tired, so will sign off and see you all tomorrow.

Steve

Another Day

Well another full day for me, and am still preparing myself for my return to
work, I just have to prove to myself and Mark, that I am capable of working
a full day in the office, once I can do this I can then explain to the
olcologist and he will allow me to go back on a phased return.

I will admit tio being tired, but this is probably two things, the treatment
but also the fact that I'm getting back into a 9 - 5 routine, which is
obviously a change to my system.

I'm coping well with it though. Its nice though that I'm being included in
the office and that fact im working with the team rather than assisting on
minor things.

I'm off to bed shortly as im tired, and its Shameless so will watch that and
fall asleep.... ) probably in the wrong order)

Health Wise I do have headache today, but that's probably down to the fact o
have work a baseball cap all day, my own fault I know....

Tomorrow I'm taking a day out and have a number of things I need to sort out
so that will be me.

Steve

Office Based...

Well it's been another busy day in my little world, I have worked a full day
for work, which for me is a positive step forward for me returning to work
whilst my treatment continues.

I really want to go back to work as I'm literally going stare crazy at home
so today has been a good indicator that I can do it, although I won't be
going back full time as that would simply tire me out, as I'm am tired today
so early night for me I think.

One of the issues I do have though working out of the office is the speed of
my PC, I simply can't do everything I could do in the office, my machine
just doesn't go as fast as I need it to or I want it too. This again is a
good thing as it stops me from doing too much and taking too much on.

The bookings for the Drag acts are coming in again, and am enjoying being
part of that whole drag network again. I'm hoping to expand this area over
the next couple of months as part of the Drag Queen Superstore network.

Anyway am off to bed as am tired, although I may watch Shameless in bed
until I fall asleep.

Till tomorrow when I'm doing another full day

Steve

Last day of Chemo

Well today has been the last day of my chemo on this month's cycle (that
sounds so American) and I now have 23 days off, and to be honest I feel
fine, which I'm only taking as a good sign.

Today I haven't stopped though which again is a good sign. We went this
morning to the Museum of Museums to use marks entry tickets bought by Nick
and Geoff (they came with us too) and we went to see the Tutankhamen
exhibition which is really good so thanks to Nick and Geoff that gift again.

After the exhibition we wandered round the ships at the Trafford centre, we
managed to buy a Christmas present in the sales so that's us now with two
presents already bought for next year...

This evening has been spent sorting sales out from the shop (which are going
mad this evening strangely) and also the entertainment diary for the pub
which is now complete and am moving onto February.

Tomorrow looks like a full day at my desk for the office as I have loads to
catch up on.

Going to sign off now as were playing Monopoly on the Wii and its getting
high level.... Basically Marks winning.

Till tomorrow

Steve

Busy Busy Busy

Well it's the penultimate day of this round of Chemo and I'm doing well.

Today we have been back to Makro and have bought two new mattresses (both
memory foam) one for my mum and dad and one for Nick and Geoff. We must have
started a trend, who else wants one???

We then delivered said mattress to Nick and Geoff and then back home for a
royal visit from our friend Stephen who has bought us some lovely presents
that fit with our new lounge.

It was then back up to my mum and dad's to deliver their bed and dinner with
them, lovely curry......

Then back home and catching up on some emails, and sort the entertainment
out for a bar that am working with, they wanted trouble but I explained that
were on a sabbatical for obvious reasons, and so they have asked me to
manage all the drag entertainment. Which isn't easy trying to sort out
several nights a week with different acts at such short notice, but it's
done now, I just have to write the contracts and posters.

I have had one rather random message though on Facebook today from an ex
business partner, that has rather perplexed me, and I don't know what to do
about it, should I contact them or leave t well alone....

Anyway, am off to the Tutankhamen exhibition in Manchester with mark, Nick
and Geoff, it was actually a present for Marks birthday in December, so we
have decided o go tomorrow.

Anyway will sign off I have a mountain of contracts to write and posters to
produce.

Till tomorrow

Steve

Again

Well I done it again.

I didn't do blog yesterday as I just got wrapped up in the daily routine of
everything.

I did a load of work for the office, did a little washing, did a little bit
of tidying and then when everyone else came home we took down the rest of
the Christmas Shizzle. It's a mammoth task at the best of times bit it's all
done now. It's all in boxes ready to go back in storage.

Then in the evening we played Monopoly on the Wii and Nick and Geoff joined
us. Was nice just not to do anything in particular.

Today its boxes in storage then no plans other than Muffy will be making an
appearance at some point.

Will update later on what I get upto.

Steve

Yesterday

Well I have a confession.

I didn't do a blog yesterday, I basically forgot....

I had a good day yesterday, I worked from home for most of the day and had a
really productive day.

I managed to clear my inbox of old items that needed to be done but just got
left because of Christmas and New Year.

I now want to go back to work, as I'm beginning to feel like a house
prisoner during the day. I did ask the Oncologist if I could go back on
reduced hours and he said that I should get the first cycle of my Chemo out
of the way first to see how it makes me feel. I finish on Monday so
hopefully one day next week I will make it into the office.

Even if it was just 2 days a week I could at least get out of the house and
socialise with people again, I'm sick of talking to the cats, as they argue
the point and I'm never tight (OK so they don't argue with me but the scrap
with each other and wander off when I want a conversation)

One thing that did happen yesterday was GTEN television, who we were
supposed to be doing a cooking program with last year have asked would I
like to do a video diary for their website, on who I am how am feeling etc
and how Cancer has affected my life. I said I would think about it, it might
me another therapeutic outlet for me who knows, I said I would let him know
tonight.

Anyway

Will sign off for now and update on my day today later this evening.

Shake Rattle and Roll

Well today has been a long day as have spent most of it in the hospital
waiting for various things.

First the appointment was half an hour late and then we had to wait for the
prescription for my new load of medication.

For various reasons it took over 2 hours for them to dispense my new meds,
but I have them now so I can't complain.

My new regime (well for the next 5 days anyway) is a mix of Chemo, anti
sickness, stomach protectors, a reduced dosage but increased number of
steroids and my usual dose of immune boosting drugs too, so I would
literally rattles if you picked me up.

Anyway I have now taken all my medication for today and I can honestly say
that the only side effect I get is that they give me heartburn and the
burps, which is what I discovered last time, so I just have to go with the
flow.

I also asked if I could go back to work after this first cycle of Chemo, and
they haven't said yes and they haven't said no, they said that I should see
how I am when I'm under the treatment, which is a positive sign for me, but
will see when I get through this next stage.

Tomorrow is the first day back to normal in the house, Mark will be back to
work, and I will be working from home again, and I will hope to catch up on
the few items I have missed over Xmas and New Year. Working from home will
occupy my time though and get me into a mind frame ready for when I do
manage to get back to the office.

Anyway am tired now so am off to bed.

Will update tomorrow.

Steve x

Back to reality

Well we finally made it back to Manchester after winding our way back home.
We stopped at Shrewsbury and a number of Garden centres on the way home, we
then also stopped at marks and Spencer to buy things for dinner.

Mark has done his usual master chef routine and whizzed up a lovely curry
for dinner.

Last night was what we both needed, just to get away from it all and not
think about anything other than ourselves, were both ready now for
tomorrow's meeting with Dr McBaine at Christies for the start of my next 6
months of treatment.

One thing I did do yesterday that didn't bother me at all is I went to
dinner last night and breakfast this morning without wearing anything on my
head. I'm getting used to appearing in public with my baldy head. I don't
find it much of an issue any more, although if I was to go shipping I would
still wear a hat as my head gets cold.

Because we haven't done much thinking about anything in particular today, I
don't have a lot on my mind.

I'm a little tired though today as have done a lot of walking.

Will update tomorrow with the details of my meeting with the Oncologist.

Steve x

End of a lovely day.

Well were in our lovely bed in the castle. We had a lovely dinner and I even had a couple of glasses of wine too.

Back to the room we have just relaxed and enjoyed the fact we have nothing to do.

Were going to get up in the morning so we can have breakfast and then take some pictures round the castle as its such a photogenic place. Then we have no plans at all will just take the day as it comes.

This may be posted at any time between midnight and breakfast as I don't have signal on my phone and I only get sporadic coverage when the wind is blowing in he right direction......

Anyway going to sign off as early start.

Till then.

Steve x
Sent via the Trouble BlackBerry®

Peckforton Castle

Well we have finally arrived at the hotel after stopping at a few craft shops along the way.
It takes ages to drive through the castle grounds, but eventually you arrive at the fairy tale style castle.

There are Peacocks wandering round the inner castle walls which is nice and tranquil.

Our room is lovely and was nicely provided with a chilled bottle of bubbly. Mark has just finished his bath in the slipper bath with a glass of bubbly and I will be jumping in shortly.

Were then off for dinner in the restaurant. The rest of the evening is unplanned so who knows. Will update later.

Steve x
Sent via the Trouble BlackBerry®

Out with the old....

Well like I said yesterday, today was going to be a sorting out day, and we
have, the pair of us, its actually been an infectious sorting out as Mark's
mum has been doing the same too.

Between the three of us we have managed to sort out 4 large black bags of
stuff to go to the charity shop, which means we all have more space in our
wardrobes.

Even though its been a hectic day and very productive, its also been a good
day as its helped keep me occupied and not think about the last few days,
and the simple fact of clearing out drawers and having a clear and fresh
start has also helped mentally too as I appear to have had a mental clear
out too whilst I was at it.

Also this afternoon we have paced for our evening away at Peckforton Castle
(its the CSL advert castle in the background). We will be staying tomorrow
night and will be driving down tomorrow morning, it will be nice to just get
away from it all and not think about anything in particular, were just going
to go and relax and soak in the atmosphere.

As for the rest of the week its going to be pretty hectic and I have
literally run into 2011 with a full diary.

I am back at Christies on Wednesday for the start of my next 6 months of
treatment and then on Friday I am having my second full body massage.

All this whilst also trying to fit in my daily duties for the office. I
want to get this first week of Chemo out of the way so that I know how I
feel as I would ideally like to go back to work, at least part time from the
office, as im simply bored to tears at home. Mark has said there is loads of
things I can do at home to occupy myself, but the whole being at home is
what bores me. Even if I could just do a couple of hours in the office every
day that would alleviate the problem, and I would probably achieve more
overall. Time will tell.

Anyway am supposed to be watching Dirty Dancing, as Mark has insisted I
watch it (I have never actually seen it) so will sign off till tomorrow when
I will be updating via my mobile.

Steve

It started better than the last one finished.

Well 2011 has started much better than 2010 finished.

I woke up this morning after going back to bed in a much more sociable mood,
Mark too was in a more sociable mood.

E have had a lovely day and have been spoiled too, we were collected by Nick
at about 3pm to be taken to their house for dinner and we played Wii
afterwards, now four of us sat there giggling like school children isn't
something that should be allowed (but oh so much fun)

Thanks for the afternoon guys, it's really put a spring in our step and am
now ready to hit the coming week with gusto.

Am off to bed now as have loads to do tomorrow, I feel a day of sorting
coming on.

Steve x

Happy New Year Bles

Its am on new years day and I have just got up, I was actually in bed at 9pm
last night because things were shitty.

Yesterday wasn't a particularly good day anyway for two reasons, first
everyone is excited about the new year looking forward making plans planning
the year ahead etc etc etc, and for obvious reasons I just ant get into that
thought of mind even though I am being positive, it still bites inside. I
cans even plan simple things sometimes as treatments and the fact I don't
know how I will be feeling all stand in the way.

The other reason yesterday wasn't ery good was its the 1st anniversary of
the death of my aunt, she too died of cancer a year ago today, so this
really hit home.

So all in all it wasn't a very good day for me, and I will admit I was quiet
and did want to be on my own.

On the other hand Mark hates NY anyway so he too was in a crabby mood and do
the majority of yesterday we spent blanking each other - he thinks I was
blanking him I think he was blanking me so were both at fault. Not a good
end to the new year as we were both in bed silently at 9pm like I said.

I have woken up in a much less bitter mood this morning and hope he does
too, either way it will be sorted out.

As for the day ahead were off to Nick and Geoff's for dinner which will be
nice and will give us chance to start the new year on a positive.

One thing that did keep me occupied yesterday was the arrival of my new
gadget my new Pet Nabaztag (www.violet.net) and I spent some of the
afternoon trying to get that set up over the internet. Its basically an
entertainment system in the form of a rabbit that sits wherever, connects to
your WIFI and tells you the time, plays music, brings you the news and can
be programmed to do a number of other things too - these Ii have yet to do.
You can link it to other Nabazag bunnies around the world and they interact
with each other. I'm later going to figure out how to get it to work with my
Skype account so I can chat more with Leon in Israel

I'm going to sign off now as am going to go bck to bed for an hour, I have
had a cup of tea so might sleep for an hour or so.

Will update more later.

Happy New Year too

Steve

Family Lies

Today was a good day to start with, I woke up OK I managed to get a little
more sleep last night although it could be better. Marks snoring and tossing
and turning don't help as he's not sleeping well either, but also the green
tea I am drinking is also causing me to go to the toilet several times in
the night (this is one of the good properties as it clears out your body)
but not at 4am unfortunately it comes from China, so it obviously runs on a
different time zone.

After I had done my work for the office we went out to buy some essentials,
it's a normal week now so the house has to go on and I have a mountain of
washing to do and no washing powder to do it with. So off to Makro we went.
Anyway long story short we ended up buying the most random basket of stuff
and a new mattress, which was a much needed purchase.

Anyway if your following my blog you will know we were looking for a pocket
sprung memory foam topped non roll together mattress, we have actually ended
up with a full memory foam mattress, and it's now got pride of place on our
bed.

Now this will only apply to anyone that has ever bought a full memory foam
mattress but they come in small boxes and don't look like they will ever fit
your bed, the box does also say that once opened they cannot be repackaged,
you see why when you open the plastic on the thin ring of foam in the box,
the thing just grows and grows and before you know it, something the size of
a small padded blanket turns into a full mattress.

Will give a verdict on how it sleeps tomorrow, but have had a lay down on it
and it all feels ok.

This evening I got a phone call from mu mum to say there was a problem, this
didn't sound too good and I steadied myself for the next bit of the
conversation. My mum had said that my granny had found out that I had
Cancer. We haven't told my granny any of my medical treatment other than the
fact that I had an operation on my head because I was having migraines, and
I showed her the scar that was left, but never mentioned anything about
cancer. At 87 we felt as a family it would be too much of a shock for her to
handle so we played down that side and simply said I was under treatment for
the operation. Anyway after yesterdays visit and her seeing me with a bald
head she has put 2 and 2 together and rightly got 4.

Sadly she has already lost one son Stephen (who died in the October 1978 and
I was born in the April of 1979, I was then looked after by my granny from
an early age so I have always had a special bond as she has been my second
mother) she also lost a daughter on NYE last year, both people died of
cancer so especially this week it's going to be playing on her mind. The one
bad thing is, she has only ever seen the negative side effects of cancer and
its treatment, for example my Uncle Stephen had Chemo but intravenously and
obviously on a stronger dose and it made him very ill and lost all his hair
as it can do, this my gran saw and is now transferring that image to me.

Anyway, Mark and my mum went to see my gran this evening to explain the
whole story, and both Mark and myself were adamant that she should now know
the full story other than the final prognosis, as ultimately that's not nice
for anyone to know and I don't intend to fit within those statistics
either..

My granny now feels so much better that she actually knows the full story
and that she is not left in the dark about me. I will call her in the
morning and see how she is and hopefully she will have had a better night's
sleep. When I start my Chemo again next week I will ensure that I go and
show her the chemo tablets that I am on so that she can see that it doesn't
make me ill like it did my Uncle Stephen and that I can carry on as normal,
at least then it's one less thing for her to worry about, which makes me
feel better too.

The one thing I have learned out of all this is I can't protect other people
around me all of the time, and that something this small has upset quite a
few people and given me more stress than I need, so going forward if there
is something to be said about my illness or anything in general it's going
to get said, if it upsets a couple of people then that's the way its going
to be. I wouldn't intentionally upset people by my actions or comments, but
I can't handle the added stress that the backlash can cause

As for the rest f the family, its also going to be a lot easier for them, as
everyone knows the same story and nobody has to mind what they are saying in
front of Granny, at least if someone asks a question, the correct answer can
be given and not worry who overhears it.

Anyway am going to go and try out the new mattress as I'm really tired.

Until New Years Eve

Steve

I think we need to go shopping

Today has been a bit of a casual day and more normal than its been for a
while.

Michelle and Dave went home this morning, Lawrence was already in work, and
the house appears to be back to normal (although the cats are still paranoid
that there is a dog somewhere....)

We went upto Oldham today to see if the sales there were any better, but
they weren't, so we just picked up my Granny and brought her back to the
house so that she could see the decorations and have dinner.

Was nice to have her around even though she's a little scatty at times if
you listen for long enough you get the idea, she's actually the most clued
up senile person I know. We shouldn't laugh but she does do some of it for
effect and attention.

One thing we do need to look at though in the sales is a new mattress I
think. Neither of us are sleeping as good as we should, so tomorrow I think
we will be off to the bed centre and look at a pocket sprung, memory foam
anti roll together moisture resistant hypoallergenic chiropractic
orthopaedic mattress, or something along those lines anyway, I have
absolutely no idea about buying a mattress I just go and lay down on one, if
it's comfortable that's the one I buy, but Mark has other ideas.

Health wise today the headaches are still staying at bay and am only on one
steroid a day so that's good, I'm going to try and reduce this further next
week as I know I need to come off them sooner rather than later.

My alternative medication routine is still going well and am taking a whole
host of immune-boosting drugs that appear to be helping me, even Mark is
taking a multi vitamin every day to stay healthy. It all appears to be
working as people around me are getting the sniffles and are feeling under
the weather and I appear to be OK.

Anyway am off to bed now so will sign off.

Night all

Steve x

Normality has started to return

Well today has been slightly back to normal again. Although Michelle and
Dave are still here, it's not like it's been a special occasion (that sounds
horrible, but I just mean it's been normal)

Me and Mark popped out to a retail park this afternoon to whiteness the non
sales, you know it's bad when the pound shop has a half price sale!!!

We did buy a couple of things, but nothing that were in the sale and stuff
that we wanted anyway so just part of our normal shopping rounds.

On a health note, I'm actually doing OL, I have now managed to come down on
my steroids from 4mg to 2mg and have been ok for the last few days so am
going to go down to 1mg in the next few days and see if I can come off them
completely in the next couple of weeks. The aching has subsided a little
more and I only notice it now when I do to much, which is something I'm
learning to see the signs of.

Am off to bed shortly otherwise I will end up on eBay again and buying
allsorts.... now that's somewhere I can easily get lost for a couple of
hours - luckily tonight Mark has occupied me with sticking diamante to a new
throw for our bed, they are champagne crystals in a border design so will
add a picture when I have done.

One thing that someone has pointed out to me is that the other day I posted
a link to the Infi-Kint website for Macmillan and that I had added the
Macmillan website not the infi-knit links, so here it is

http://www.infi-knit.org.uk/

Its an online petition but it's in a novelty form of a scarf, and it will be
knitted in front of you via their two online webcams. Go check it out, it's
for a good cause and only takes seconds.

Anyway am off, have another long day tomorrow, will be going to Oldham to
have a scout round there and then pick up Granny and bring her back to our
house so that she can have dinner with us and then mum will take her home
tomorrow evening.

Till tomorrow

Steve

Sales....

Well today has been another day of food and shopping, so it must still be
Christmas.

We wanted to pop the Trafford Centre, this was the biggest mistake of the
day as everyone else in Manchester decided to do the same thing.

I have actually felt a lot better today and the aching I have been suffering
from has subsided a little. I'm still plodding on though and moving round
does actually help so just popping to the sales is good for me, but my head
just isn't into it (this would be the same no matter what health I was in,
as I just hate gormless people that walk around shopping centres with not a
care in the world)

The sales are not that good anyway so you're not missing anything if you
haven't been yet.

Tomorrow is going to be a relating day as we have nothing at all planned,
then my mum is down in the evening so back to a normal week more or less.

Anyway am going to sign off as its late and I need to go o bed, although I
must admit for having an hour's nap this afternoon whilst watching the TV
(Mark did the same)

Steve

Fatty

Well the end of Boxing Day is upon us, and am feeling FAT

I cant believe how much food we have managed to consume in the last 48
hours, and there is still mountains of the stuff in the kitchen.

Today we have joined the rest of the world am sure and popped out to the
sales. Now why is it that jumper/pair of shoes/new food blender or whatever
it is that wasn't appealing to you three days ago, is now something you HAVE
to have and will go hell for leather to get it.

Needless to say we did purchase something, but it was something we actually
wanted so all worth it.

The big downside to today is the fact I have been really tired, I know we
had a late night last night but I have been tired, and I had a couple of
hours in bed this afternoon but the achiness is still there.

Tomorrow I'm back to work (from home) it won't take me that long to do my
report, but its my routine of normality so something that has to be done.

I also have an order to process for the shop too, which arrived on Xmas
morning, so the post office is open tomorrow so that will be going out
tomorrow too.

http://www.macmillan.org.uk/Home.aspx this is my little ask for today, that
you complete the Infi-knit petition for Macmillan they are presenting the
petition to the government in the form of a knitted scarf, which will be
knitted with your words (its changed to graphics) on screen for you and
knitted into their scarf live on screen.

It takes seconds to do, and is for a worthwhile cause, and I don't ask
people often to help out.

Anyway am off to bed another day tomorrow and am sure we will be popping to
the sales so need all my strength for that.

Steve

Christmas Day

Well it's been a lovely day, it's been a long day but lovely.

The day started at around 9.30am when I got up.... some people had been up
since 7am but the rest of the family decided to stay in bed....

When we had all assembled in the lounge - all six of us (mums and dads and
me and Mark) we started the mammoth operation that was present opening. I'm
sure there will be photographs posted in the next few days of the mountain
that was our presents but until then you're just going to have to believe me
that It was huge.

I had no idea of any of the presents that I had received this year, which
was really nice as it was a genuine surprise and a bit like being a kid
again....

It was nice to spend quality time with my parents as its not something I get
to do often, and having them in my own home and seeing them relaxed helped
the situation. Seeing both families together also made it a nice day. The
nice thing about today is, my dad was completely relaxed and had a nice
time. There is no issue of me and Mark from my dad like there was a couple
of years ago, but today really proved that he has no issues, he even managed
to get a couple of cheeky banters in with Lawrence and Mark.

After we had opened all our presents (and had a cuppa, we are British after
all) Michelle and Dave arrived, so we did it all, more presents and more
wrapping paper.

Mark, has done a sterling job this weekend of preparing and cooking the
dinner (although some fairies did peel the vegetables this morning when we
were in bed so thanks to them for that) We managed to get the dinner out in
a speedy fashion between me and Mark, and the whole process was pretty
simple. I even had the dishwasher running after the starters with the first
load of dishes, (I had already done 3 loads earlier in the morning) The
dinner was lovely and again it was a nice time to sit around the table and
laugh about things.

Lawrence thanked mark and myself for doing the dinner, but then also said
how proud he was of me for going through what am going through, and proposed
a toast. This got to me slightly and also got to my dad, so I tried to move
on as swiftly as possible, The Xmas dinner table isn't somewhere to be
dwelling on things like my illness.

Of all the things I wanted today, my illness not being centre stage has been
one of them, I haven't purposely mentioned it, and if people have asked me
to stop or sit down I have just said I am fine and carried on, although I
have at a couple of points today had t just sit and take a breath as I have
had an achy body, which is now becoming a regular occurrence, its just my
body's way of saying "slow down" I think, so I'm just going to have to
listen to what its saying.

Today has been nice as I have (and me and Mark collectively) have received
some lovely gifts from friends and family. We will be saying a personal
thanks to you all in the next few days and will ensure that we enjoy your
gifts. One in particular we will be enjoying at the start of next month,
which will be nice as its the day before my treatment starts again so will
be a nice "take your mind off it" experience.

I received loads of lovely gifts from Mark too, I think the nicest of these
is the Ruby ring. For those that don't know what Ruby signifies is Love, and
as he has already bought me loads of diamonds which signify forever, now he
can say he has given me love forever (mushy isn't it, but its really touched
me)

One thing we have both done today is thonk about memories, I bought Mark an
aftershave, which reminds me of the first few meetings with him, and he
bought me an aftershave of the first aftershave that we bought together.
Sounds daft but its these things that mean more to the two of us than other
gifts to each other, but was also sweet that we both did the same thing.

Its nearly 4am now as we haven't long since come back from Nick and Geoff's,
where we spent this evening, it was nice to let Tanja and Lawrence have time
with Michelle and Dave, and also for us to get out of the office. Nick got
an IPad for Christmas, and now I so want one, I want on a lot, and am sure
Mark does too, as he can play bejewelled on it in a much bigger format. I
will have to wait and see what the sales have to offer to see if I can
replace my laptop. I will see.

Since I started writing this blog about half an hour ago, Mark has been
playing with his Flashes that I got him for his camera. He's like the David
Bailey of Salford now, and has a choice of two Flashes' bith with different
uses, so in the last 30 mins I'm sure he has taken about 1000 pictures of me
and the lounge, I'm starting to feel like Cheryl Cole at the weekend.....

Anyway I'm tired now, and its the sales tomorrow so were off to go buy a
Sofa and a new floor, a VAT free bedroom and a Moben designer Kitchen
(that's all the adverts I have seen anyway).

Would just like to sign off and say I love all my friends and Family and
although I don't say it often, I should. It's been a lovely day and have
really enjoyed it.

Steve xx

Exmas Eve

Well that's it, its tomorrow, the big day when we spend hours looking at
presents that our friends have lovingly picked for us...

This evening has been spent with My mum and dad, Mark's mum and dad and Nick
and Geoff. It was nice just to be around and watch the weather on TV, at
least we don't have to go out tomorrow though....

Tomorrow is going to be a slow start I think, and then it's going to be
mayhem all day, as there is going to be 2 lots of mums 2 lots of dads, me
and Mark two cats and a dog.....

Anyway am tired now so am going to head off, that and Father Christmas wont
come if I don't go to sleep.

Till the big day tomorrow

Little Tired Elf Steve

Christmas Eve - Early Doors

I'm tired.

We have done loads today, Mark has been in the kitchen like Fanny Craddock
all day making Mince Pies and the sort for this evening.

The last of the presents have yet to be cooked and the veg for tomorrow
needs to be prepped, but I can do all that shortly.

I thought I would update now just in case I don't get chance to update
later, at least I have done it.

If I don't update later on, I hope all my readers have a brilliant day
tomorrow and don't get too drunk tonight......

Have a blast whatever your upto.

Christmas Elf Steve xxx

Christmas Eve Eve

Well today has been a mixed bag of things and its certainly made for a
random day.

First off we were woken up by Tanja to tell us that the main water pipe
entering the house had burst and that the water board were going to attend
so we don't need to report it. The result is the stopcock out the front of
our house has burst on the pavement and as a result we now have an ice rink
outside the house. They did attend earlier on but just covered the whole
area in rock salt, which is good really as the flowing water has just washed
it away.....

Today the house cleanup has also commenced, and I have done bits around the
house to help, however I have had a nap this afternoon as I have been tired
and achy today. The house though is almost done and Mark has performed his
magic and the dining table is starting to look fabulous.

All the items I have ordered for Mark have now arrived and are now wrapped
so that's good, I just need to put tags on them and make sure that I have
everything (I even went through the bottom of my wardrobe to make sure I had
everything)

Tomorrow is going to be another early start as mark wants to get all Fanny
Craddock and make some cakes, I fancy making stuff too so will give him a
helping hand. It's then finish laying the table and last bits of tidying and
then everyone will start to arrive. And then its relax time.

Am off to bed now, I'm going to head off with a cup of Chinese tea to work
its wonders whilst I sleep.

Steve

and its all done....

Well apart from the bits we need to do at home, which won't actually take
that long we have done for Christmas.

The last bits of food shopping have just been done and its sat outside in
the car (its -8 so am sure the fresh stuff will be OK)

I'm looking forward to the weekend now as its going to be a fun weekend with
both sets of parents and my sister and brother in law, the day promises to
be fun, and this year I can honestly say I haven't got a clue what presents
I have got.

Tomorrow will be spent tidying up and doing the last few fancy bits round
the house ready for the arrival of everyone on Friday, and then it's the big
day.

On a health noted. I have today started on traditional Chinese Green tea,
now I have been drinking Green Tea for a couple of weeks now but this is the
supermarkets own, the one im drinking isone my mum bought fr me from the
heath food shop and is in leaf form, it tastes much better than the
supermarket stuff (there isn't actually that much taste to it) but its not
processed like the supermarket stuff so I am going to give it a go. There is
a load of benefits that go with it, so it can only help.

The one good side of it is that it detoxifies the body, I have noticed that
my skin is getting better too, so its doing something somewhere at least.

Am off to bed now as my body is aching.

Till tomorrow

Steve

Lazy

There is one word for today and that's Lazy.

We haven't done an awful lot really. Mark has made up the spare room for my
parents this weekend and I threw the vac around the house and loaded the
dishwasher but that was about it.

My brother and Dr Jon came today too so that filled up a big part of the
afternoon. There hasn't been a reason for the laziness from either of us,
its just we have collectively done not a lot, and to be honest its been nice
that we have just both pottered around doing little things.

I made dinner this evening, a good old traditional Lancashire dish Tata Ash
(potato hash to some) and I was going to make it a seasonal dish for a laugh
and put sprouts in it but I forgot.... Anyway we all enjoyed it and my mum
always does love it so that's a good thing.

The plans for Christmas are still going on, and home is almost finished just
a last few things to do and were ready.

Tomorrow were off to do more of the Santa deliveries and then to the
Supermarket for the last few things.

Off to bed now long day of niceness tomorrow, now you know it's not my
nature to be nice lol...

Steve x

A good day

Today has been an easier day and the headaches have now more or less
stopped. I had my medication review this morning and they have decided to
keep me on the steroids for the next 14 days, however I have stated that I
would like to reduce the dosage over the next few weeks ready for coming off
them mid Jan, but I know that I need to do this much slower this time as the
last. Time will tell.

This evening we have done the first part of the Santa Rounds, we went to my
Granny's to drop her presents off, then we went up to Chris and Harold's
with nick and Geoff to do the same there. It's nice doing the Xmas drop off
and collect, but its a shame that we don't see these people as often as we
should do.

The rest of the week is going to be spent doing the last bits of prep for
Xmas prep and dropping off Xmas presents then it's the big day on Saturday,
all sounds dead easy doesn't it really....

Not much else to write today so will sign off till then.

Steve x

Just one of those days

Today has been another of those days where things have just happened around
me, and in all honesty I have just let it, there has been no plans made for
today at all which for once as been really good.

The one thing that we have done today is pop down to the Village as Peggy
Was doing her Xmas show, She said she would be doing it in aid of Christies
Hospital and would love to see us both.

Neither me or Mark have been to the village since my diagnosis, so it was
odd just popping in to say hello and seeing all those familiar faces. Anyway
we didn't stay very long as my body was aching and we came home for a nice
cuppa...

I would like to go out more, but at the moment my body just wouldn't let me
stand the pace, and I would end up having to leave and I would feel guilty
for spoiling the evening for everyone else.

Well tomorrow is Monday again, and I have my Doctors appointment to discuss
my steroids again, I would presume that they will be taking me off them
again slowly, but I hope this time they will do it more gradually as the
last two times has been murder, so only tomorrow will tell.

Anyway it's been a long day and am off to bed see if I can shake these aches
I have.

Steve x

Lazy Day

Well I can honestly say we haven't done much today.

We popped to the wholesalers this morning to get the last few things for
Christmas, why do we spend so much on Christmas its one day, but we still do
it.

Anyway we spent an hour an hour in there and then returned home, shopping
away and we haven't done much since.

This evening friends came round for an hour before they too decided to go
home, and now were just sat watching the TV like its Christmas or
something....

Tomorrow I would like to go see Peggy's Show at the New York New York, as
it's all in aid of Christies Hospital.

So sorry for the short update, but I can't make it up and I'm feeling tired
anyway so will sign off

Steve