Sunday, 13 October 2013

Very long overdue...

I started writing this entry (Friends) a few weeks ago and never got around to finishing it or posting it to my blog.  As I have a few minutes spare at work, (an extremely rare occurrence lately) I've decided to finish it off and add a little update so, nothing for months then a huge tsunami of blogging at once!


I'm sat in bed wondering what I will achieve this morning before I go off to work and I started to consider my friends and that's got me thinking....  So, I've decided to write a blog as I have been very aware lately that I've not written for a very long time.

I've thought a lot about my friends recently.  In part because I've deactivated my Facebook account so don't see what my friends are up to now but mainly because there are a few more I have parted company with.  There have been no arguments but sometimes our lives go in different direction.  If a friend cannot accept your life choices and it causes friction between you, then is there any point in trying to maintain a fractious relationship? The situation isn't going to change and I'm fed up of trying to please other people.  Again, losing Stephen made me realise life is too short to waste time on those who don't appreciate you.

I think I have quite a small circle of friends.  I've never been one to "collect friends" and have never felt the need to have lots of people around me but I feel those I do have around me are very special to me.

This week I've been thinking about Christmas, the fact it's just 115 days away (as of today it's only 72 days away so you can see how long this has taken to complete) and I've been thinking about those friends who I rarely see but do get to see at Christmas.  I love it.  It's great to catch up with them, sharing news and gossip from the months since I saw them last.  This is my point exactly, I don't need to see my friends daily or weekly to consider them friends.  They remain friends because of their actions and attitude and not judging me. 

Both Jon and I have enjoyed spending time with friends this summer.  We've not spent as much time as we would have liked but that's mainly due to work commitments and decorating at home but we've appreciated the time we've had with them.  We've both had issues and problems to deal with elsewhere but they'll sort themselves out with time.  For now though we will just look forward to less hectic lifestyles and more time with friends.


I'm in quite a reflective mood today.  Reading my blog above I suppose has contributed but by far the biggest influence on my mood today, (and for the past few days to be honest), is the fact that tomorrow, Monday, would have been my 7th anniversary of Steve and I getting hitched.  It was a lovely day, everything went perfectly and it was an enjoyable, stress free and over far too soon.

I've debated with myself many times the thought of "til death us do part" and how I'd never have considered Steve and I would part so soon afterwards.  Our 'lifetime' together spanned just 4 anniversaries so that's just four anniversaries as a married man and now I'm on to my third as a widower.  It's a thought that makes me only too aware of how quickly time passes us by.

So, what will I be doing to mark the occasion?  In short, not a lot, I'm working.  At the same time whilst it is important to look back and accept where you've come from I think it's also important to look to the present and to the future.  This makes me grateful for the partner I have and the future we are able to build together.  Not forgetting our pasts but learning from them and looking forward to a brighter future.

The Rest

I suppose then all that's left to say is to mention a few highlights since I blogged last.  There are loads but amongst them are:

1) My parents have celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary with a party at home and then a road trip around Scotland.  It was great to see friends and family and a good time was had by all.  The weather was good and I thoroughly enjoyed cooking for them all, (although I did make far too much food).

2) There's been a new addition to the family.  A lovely baby boy who decided to keep us waiting almost two weeks more than he was supposed to but he was well worth the wait and is adorable.  

3) Jon and I have taken a trip to the Channel Isles to see family.  It was the first time I'd met them and was the first time in many years Jon had seen them too so it was lovely to just spend time with them.

4) A dear friend of mine has been appointed as a representative of The Queen as a deputy lieutenant.  It's a well deserved position and it suits her personality too so I look forward to hearing the many stories I am sure she will have over the coming weeks, months and years.

Lowlights include:

1) Health issues within the family, not just on a personal note with Jon and I but also the wider family.  This has caused a ripple effect, much like throwing a boulder in a pond.  It's difficult being unable to help though.

2) Health issues with friends, one in particular is battling a cancer and there are others, equally concerning.  I want to do more to help but my hours at work, more specifically the antisocial non working hours aren't helping.

3) Taking on too much work, trying to renovate a kitchen, bathroom and a few other rooms in the house consecutively really does take it's toll on your motivation and energy levels.  It seems like a never ending slog.

Reasons to be cheerful:

1) It's holiday planning time for Jon and I.  We both turn 40 next year so we are hoping to go away for each of our birthdays, Purses permitting.

2) I have some time off in November to go and visit my Sister, visit some friends down south, a shopping day with Mum and a beer sampling day with a legendary lesbo!  (The hidden negative is that these trips are punctuated with work and MUST DO DIY tasks.

3) Christmas is coming (Yay!) although this means I am VERY behind on making and crafting things for gifts and I will be working most of it but still, I love the festive season.

Well, that's about all I'm going to bore you with for now.  I'm not making a promise to be back soon because I doubt I'll be able to keep it but I hope it isn't so long until I return.

Take care,