Cardiff, some old some new

Well, here I am sat in a bar in Cardiff, it's been a little bit of a surprise to say the least as Cardiff has changed so much since I was here last in 2009. We stopped off in Caerphilly yesterday on our way, it was mainly closed but it still seems odd to be somewhere which is so familiar but still so strange to me. After that my memory was well and truly tested as we tried to find an old favourite pub hidden well within the country lanes atop Caerphilly mountain. We found it in the end and had a lovely meal. The pub is a favourite as it is warm and cosy and has real open fires. Steve loved it there too when we visited last. When we got to Cardiff it was difficult to navigate around the roads as a few streets have been blocked or pedestrianised and others have become one way streets etc but we finally managed to park and check in. We trundled off to the local gay scene early evening. Again there were changes as some bars have shut, others opened but again, all seemed familiar yet not so. It was also odd hearing the accent, I struggled to understand a few people too which was odd. We were pleasantly surprised at how cheap some of the beer was though, just £1.50 for a vodka & coke too so we could have got wasted..... But didn't! We were greeted by some real hospitality just after we checked in the the hotel. We took the life to our floor and shared it with two women, both mid 30's I'd say but there was them and us 3 guys in the lift. Within the space of a minute or two, (however long it takes to travel a few floors), we had been offered sex! They were not "working girls" but were certainly high spirited. I of course declined, I think the others may have too but, I think one of them was secretly chuffed at being mistaken for a straight guy! It certainly made us smile. Today I have spent a lot of the morning browsing the shops and the Victorian Arcades which Cardiff is so famous for. Again some familiar some not so. I have just stopped for lunch and to sort something for 'T' and also to collect my thoughts. Just a few hours ago I was consumed by an overwhelming feeling of grief. I struggled to hold back the tears, not a great look when out shopping. I was looking at Christmas decorations, I have been for a few weeks now and have been fine but today the grief got me. I have decided this year the tree will be decorated with hearts and tartan. Hearts to represent love for Steve and tartan just because we both loved it, loved Scotland and it is traditional and cheery. There will be no star or angel on top, my star and angel is somewhere around me. Signing off for now xxx M xxx