Well I guess it's about time I actually write something and today, being Stephens birthday seems an appropriate day. He would have been 34 today. It's his second birthday since he got his angel wings. I don't mind admitting its a difficult day. Of course I still miss Steve and then feel guilt for Jon but I think he understands. Circumstances beyond the control of either of us brought us together and far from him being a 'second option' I love them as much as each other but only one can reciprocate. I'm sure some thought it would be a "passing fad" or "on the re-bound" but that's not the case.
I am as surprised as anyone to have found someone so special so soon but we make each other happy. We've been together now well over a year. I won't say it's been easy, it's not been but, most of the difficulties have been due to factors outside out relationship so as those are resolved things just keep getting better.
When I wrote last I mentioned I was in training for my new job. It was intense to say the least and not everyone who started met the grade and completed so I was pleased to have qualified early in March. I am now a driver for Metrolink.
Yes, driving trams wasn't something I ever envisaged doing but compared to my last job it's great. The main motivation for leaving my old job was that I was working long hours, over and above those contracted with no thanks or appreciation and no monetary reward either. Here at least I have sign on and sign off times. Work outside those hours is voluntary and paid and there is no chance of me being expected to take work home. The shifts can make socialising difficult as when I finish at 1am there's few people around for a chat but the shifts are planned well in advance so at least I know when the next break is coming. All in all, the stress if training was worth it and now I get to enjoy driving a 2Million pounds vehicle weighing around 40 Tons (unloaded) and seeing the sights and sounds of Manchester and surrounding areas on a daily basis.
Looking back there are a few other significant events, flowers from Jon, a visit from Spider-Man and some weekends away including a beautiful 5 star mini break with Jon for passing my exams and most recently a lovely weekend visiting friends. Those are the good things. On the down side my Sister is having to have her dog euthanised today.
She got her from a rescue centre, many years ago, she was an abused dog so took time to settle but she was certainly one of the family. I'm not sure how many years, probably more than 10 or 12 years but I think my sister has had the dog longer than she's had her husband! The dog has been poorly recently and the vet has advised it's "for the best" as she's likely to be in pain etc. I really feel for her an feel sad myself too because Simba really was like Michelle's shadow. I'm very sad about it too. This has come days after Jon has had to bury his Dads cat who died on Monday.
They may "only" be pets but when they are with you for many years, you care for them and nurture them and see their little personality traits and you really do become attached. My cats were great after I lost Steve, even my antisocial cat, Marmalade, would sit with me just to keep me company. Lately Tigi, who was Steve's cat before I met him, has been very affectionate to Jon. I think she approves. He is very much a cat person and she is able to look cute and make him do what she wants!
Well, time has flown by and I'm up at 4.30 am tomorrow so I'll bid you all goodnight and I hope to write soon as there's plenty more to say .
Bye for now.
Mark x
